The art of approaching women is definitely easier than most guys and so-called “gurus” out there make it out to be.

And it’s really funny what we guys do inside our heads when we want to approach women. It’s amazing how many creative ways guys figure out ways to NOT approach women!

We guys are really great at imagining all kinds of terrible and horrible results if you dare to walk up to a woman and open up your mouth and say “hi”.

Some guys imagine – and remember that this is all in their head – that if they walk across the room to approach a woman that the whole place gets quiet and everyone stops talking and is only listening to hear what will happen; they open their mouth and out comes some shaky and feeble attempt at speaking, and she just laughs in their face.

Humiliated, they imagine creeping away while everyone in the whole place just laughs and points at them – pretty creative, isn’t it?

Other guys imagine she’s like a giant and they’re a small ant compared to her.

Or they imagine that she’ll slap them, or toss a drink right into their face.

Or they imagine she’ll pull out a gun and start shooting or call the police.

Obviously, if a woman is truly mentally unstable, she might act weird when you approach her.

But unless you work in a mental institution, most of the women you could approach out there will probably not be mentally deranged.

So all those horrible things you and other guys imagine won’t actually come true.

Naturally, it’s impossible to know what kind of mood a woman is in when you approach her.

You may not get a great reaction if she’s in a bad mood, but that’s just true of anyone, right?

She might’ve just had a bad day and she just doesn’t feel open to a stranger trying to be friendly right now. You can’t know what kind of mood a woman might be in when you approach her.

It’s also true that some situations just don’t lend themselves to favorable results.

For example, I never recommend trying to meet women at bars and nightclubs. Some guys love to approach women in bars and nightclubs, but that’s not my favorite place to meet and approach women.

In bars and nightclubs, you don’t stand a very good chance because women tend to have their guard up and their defenses are on red alert in those places.

Women know that bars and nightclubs are seen by most guys as “meet markets” and pick-up spots.

When they see you coming they go on double red alert. On the other hand, in places like bookstores, seminars, coffee shops, libraries, stores, and malls, women don’t usually have their guard and defenses up exactly because they don’t see those places as “meet markets”.

Red alert status is not usually necessary in those places and you will likely have much, much better success with approaching women.

Here’s a step-by-step guide to the art of approaching women:

photo credit: brian boulos

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